Friday morning, I was sitting in the gym at Pete's PDO, waiting for their Christmas play to start. My dad was next to me, checking a ding on his phone when he told me that there had been another school shooting. My heart broke, but it wasn't in the forefront of my mind. As sad as it was, I was sure that it was another bullied or disturbed student taking it out on his classmates. I put the thought of it to the back of my mind, sat back and enjoyed enjoyed watching my little goofball hop across the stage and moo as a dove. (Yeah, my son is a ham. It's one of the reasons I love him.)
I didn't find out even the main details until several hours later, after doing some Christmas shopping, enjoying lunch with my dad and having a nice chat with him. It was then that I sat down at the computer and the full force of what had happened hit me. It wasn't high schoolers or even middle schoolers but a shooting in an elementary school. The number of dead was staggering. The fact that 2/3rd of them were children hit even more.
I wanted to drive to Teddy's school and bring him home. I wanted to hold him and never let him out of my sight again. Because these children - every single one of them - were first graders. They were all the same age as my oldest child, the one that left me for 8 hours every day, who I need to trust in others to keep safe. Visions of him lying dead in his classroom refused to leave my eyes. And if I had my van, instead of lending it to my father, I would have driven there to get him, sprained foot or not. Because I needed my son. But I also knew that it was my fear instinct kicking in and that he would be safe in his school.
Over the weekend, I hugged him more than I think he's ever been hugged in a 62 hour period. I'd told him what had happened when he got home from school on Friday, so he knew why the hugs were happening and hugged me back. He's a pretty good kid when it comes to that. I half-joked with him that I would never let him go to school again because I wanted him home with me all the time. He told me that he needed to go because he wanted to learn more than I could teach him. And while that small part of me wanted to keep him here always, there was the other part of me that knew that, if he couldn't be with me, his school was the safest and best place he could be.
I've cried a lot over the last several days, and I still am. I let things affect me too deeply sometimes. After September 11, 2001, I had the hardest time walking to work, passing all the signs of the missing. For awhile, I was forbidden from picking up the paper by my boyfriend because it made me sob. I couldn't help it, though. I felt like I needed to read these stories to honor those whose lives were lost. And it's the same thing now. I don't want to look at pictures of these kids, kids at the same point in their lives as Teddy and his friends. But I feel like I have to. That looking away is dishonoring them in some way. So I read the stories and I look at the pictures and I sob and, once again, want to grab Teddy and never let him out of my sight. And I alternately wish I didn't feel so deeply and am glad that I do.
The debate about whether firearms should be banned brings thoughts of the tragedy at Stamford, CT at the beginning of Marvel's Civil War storyline. In it, there are a team of supers that are part of a reality show. While they are chasing down some supervillains, one of the villains, Nitro, lets off a huge nuclear explosion that leaves 600 dead, including 60 children (since the fight happened outside a school). It was used as a huge push to register supers, requiring them to take off their masks and either work for the government or hang up their spandex. Tony Stark, struck very deeply by the deaths, fights for registration. Captain America believes that the registration act is wrong and fights against it. And the supers of the USA break into a Civil War because of it. The similarities between this fictional story line and what happened at Sandy Hook cause me to shudder. Not just the extreme loss of life, but the push by some to make a change in what they see as the problem - guns. How deeply this seems to be affecting most of the nation. And my thoughts continue to run in the same way - regulating supers, or banishing guns, won't help eradicate the problem. Because it's not the law-abiding people that are the problem, but the ones that don't care for the laws anyway. I'd rather see a change in the way people view those with mental health problems and the ease with which people should be able to get help. But that will be as much of a fight, I'm afraid, as those wanting to get rid of guns all together.
Nothing is going to be able to bring these children, these teachers, back to us. And, sadly, nothing is going to prevent something like this from ever happening again. But that doesn't mean that I'm going to put this in my rear-view mirror and pretend it hasn't affected me. Honestly, I don't know anyone that it hasn't affected. And I wish I could do more for these families than say, "I am so sorry. You and yours are in my thoughts." I wish I could do more for the world beyond have my thoughts and opinions. I wish I could do more to balance keeping my child safe and letting him live a full life. I wish I was all powerful.
But I'm not, and I can't. All I can do is remember and honor. And hug my boys tight one more time.
And a lot less fun than the other options.
Showing posts with label death. Show all posts
Showing posts with label death. Show all posts
18 December 2012
29 February 2012
The Sky is Shades of Gray Now that a Daydream Believer Has Left Us
In 1986, a group from my mother's teen years was having a reunion tour and coming back into national prominence. When they first came back on the music scene, I didn't care much one way or the other. It was old music from an old group.
Then I went to visit my father in Florida over the summer. And I came across their television show one night on Nickelodeon (I think I was looking for You Can't Do That on Television.) Regardless of what I was actually looking for, I got sucked into the show. It was musical, it was funny and I wanted to watch every single episode of The Monkees. I had officially become a Monkee-maniac.
I taped every episode I could that summer. When I went back to New York, I wanted to be able to watch it over and over again. I bought several of their albums (actual record albums) and a few of their tapes. My favorite was their previously unreleased stuff on Missing Links. I wore that cassette tape out listening to it over and over again. (And now, I need to go buy it on digital.) Back then, I knew everything there was to know about the Monkees and then some. I could quote stats about their albums, about each of the members, who were the players and who were the actors. I devoured everything I could about them.
I had posters on my wall with the four of them smiling down at me. I had a thing for Peter Tork, but all of them were awesome. And Davy Jones... he had the voice of an angel (and the accent to match). I wanted to go to see on e of their concerts, but it never happened. I used to make up daydreams to help me fall asleep, putting myself in as Davy's sister and getting up to hijinks with the band (I was a weird kid, what can I say?) For several years in my teens, The Monkees were at the top of my list of people I most wanted to meet.
As I got older, the obsession passed, but I still loved their show and their music. Whenever I heard one of them was going to be on a show, I made sure to watch it (in particular, I remember watching My Two Dads and Boy Meets World - shows I don't think I'd watched before or since). I got a smile any time I'd hear one of their songs on the radio. Whenever I'd meet another fan, I'd sit down to debate which episodes were better and which songs were our favorites (for me? "The Devil and Peter Tork" and "Shades of Gray" - see below). They may not have been at the top of my list any longer, but they were still there and still had a special place in my heart.
Earlier today, my friend Carmen forwarded a news alert text that she had gotten. Davy Jones, the man with that wonderful voice, died today in Florida at age 66. I couldn't believe it. I didn't want to believe it. He may have been my parents' age, but he was still an important part of my childhood. My childhood isn't supposed to go like that. So I looked on line and found out that no, it wasn't an internet hoax gone to extremes (like Jon Bon Jovi's supposed death last year). It was true. From what's been said (though not officially, unless something new has come up) he died of a heart attack. A part of my childhood was gone.
So I've spent the afternoon remembering what I loved of Davy from my Monkees years. Davy's voice, particularly in the ballads, could make me swoon any time. His diminutive height was a plus (since I'm short myself so I admire short guys). He was everyone's heart throb, but I wanted him to be my brother. I thought the Davy of the television show would have made an awesome brother.
Tonight, I'll be listening to the songs. I'll be thinking about Davy's friends and family and how this loss must be affecting them. I'll be in mourning with the other fans of this wonderful actor and music maker. I'll be queuing up clips on YouTube so I can introduce my boys' to the zaniness of four boys in a band in California. And I will probably shed a few tears.
To Davy's friends and family, my thoughts and prayers are with you now. I am so very sorry for the loss of someone so special. To Davy's fans, I am with you in grief over this news.
And to Davy, thank you for putting yourself out there, for stepping in front of the camera and in front of the microphone to entertain us for more than 45 years. You've brought joy, laughter and tears to many of us over the years and all we can say for it is "Thank you." Good-bye, and rest in peace.
Then I went to visit my father in Florida over the summer. And I came across their television show one night on Nickelodeon (I think I was looking for You Can't Do That on Television.) Regardless of what I was actually looking for, I got sucked into the show. It was musical, it was funny and I wanted to watch every single episode of The Monkees. I had officially become a Monkee-maniac.
I taped every episode I could that summer. When I went back to New York, I wanted to be able to watch it over and over again. I bought several of their albums (actual record albums) and a few of their tapes. My favorite was their previously unreleased stuff on Missing Links. I wore that cassette tape out listening to it over and over again. (And now, I need to go buy it on digital.) Back then, I knew everything there was to know about the Monkees and then some. I could quote stats about their albums, about each of the members, who were the players and who were the actors. I devoured everything I could about them.
I had posters on my wall with the four of them smiling down at me. I had a thing for Peter Tork, but all of them were awesome. And Davy Jones... he had the voice of an angel (and the accent to match). I wanted to go to see on e of their concerts, but it never happened. I used to make up daydreams to help me fall asleep, putting myself in as Davy's sister and getting up to hijinks with the band (I was a weird kid, what can I say?) For several years in my teens, The Monkees were at the top of my list of people I most wanted to meet.
As I got older, the obsession passed, but I still loved their show and their music. Whenever I heard one of them was going to be on a show, I made sure to watch it (in particular, I remember watching My Two Dads and Boy Meets World - shows I don't think I'd watched before or since). I got a smile any time I'd hear one of their songs on the radio. Whenever I'd meet another fan, I'd sit down to debate which episodes were better and which songs were our favorites (for me? "The Devil and Peter Tork" and "Shades of Gray" - see below). They may not have been at the top of my list any longer, but they were still there and still had a special place in my heart.
Earlier today, my friend Carmen forwarded a news alert text that she had gotten. Davy Jones, the man with that wonderful voice, died today in Florida at age 66. I couldn't believe it. I didn't want to believe it. He may have been my parents' age, but he was still an important part of my childhood. My childhood isn't supposed to go like that. So I looked on line and found out that no, it wasn't an internet hoax gone to extremes (like Jon Bon Jovi's supposed death last year). It was true. From what's been said (though not officially, unless something new has come up) he died of a heart attack. A part of my childhood was gone.
So I've spent the afternoon remembering what I loved of Davy from my Monkees years. Davy's voice, particularly in the ballads, could make me swoon any time. His diminutive height was a plus (since I'm short myself so I admire short guys). He was everyone's heart throb, but I wanted him to be my brother. I thought the Davy of the television show would have made an awesome brother.
Tonight, I'll be listening to the songs. I'll be thinking about Davy's friends and family and how this loss must be affecting them. I'll be in mourning with the other fans of this wonderful actor and music maker. I'll be queuing up clips on YouTube so I can introduce my boys' to the zaniness of four boys in a band in California. And I will probably shed a few tears.
To Davy's friends and family, my thoughts and prayers are with you now. I am so very sorry for the loss of someone so special. To Davy's fans, I am with you in grief over this news.
And to Davy, thank you for putting yourself out there, for stepping in front of the camera and in front of the microphone to entertain us for more than 45 years. You've brought joy, laughter and tears to many of us over the years and all we can say for it is "Thank you." Good-bye, and rest in peace.
02 May 2011
Thoughts on the Death of bin Laden
I'm still on hiatus, but with the news of the death of bin Laden, I wanted to let some of my thoughts out through my fingers. There are a lot of things running through my mind, so this may be a bit stream of consciousness.
I was in NY on 9/11/01. I was at a training class at my company's main office, across the street from the Empire State Building. As we were on the bottom floor, we weren't told anything about the planes being flown into the Twin Towers until around 10 or 10:30. That's when we were told to evacuate the building. We had no idea if more attacks would be coming, if the Empire State Building was going to be a target, or what was happening. I spent a little time in my office a few blocks over, and when the word that they were going to be opening Penn Station and letting the trains run (which was incorrect at the time), I stood with a large crowd of people outside the 32nd street entrance of Penn Station.
I remember three things most strongly from that day - the pain of my feet in slightly too tight shoes, the kindness of the crowd around me, and the fear that every one of us felt when we heard a plane overhead (US fighters, but at the time, we weren't sure of anything). I was so glad when they finally let us onto the trains 3 hours later, and felt even better when my train pulled into my home station so I could be away from the city for awhile.
The aftermath hit me the hardest. There were flyers plastered to every available surface in Penn Station, so many people begging for word on loved ones, not knowing if they were caught inside the tower when it fell. I cried daily, seeing the desperation for information and wishing I knew ways to ease their pain. Almost 10 years, and that's still the strongest memory I have - the pictures inside Penn Station.
And it's been with me for 10 years. I'm not living in NY any longer. I moved just over a year later. Nashville is very different from NYC. But the thoughts still remain. Strange as it sounds, I hope they never do. Time has given me the ability to put distance between myself and those raw emotions. But I can recall them simply, and I think to forget that would dishonor the memory of those that died.
Now the news has come that the mastermind of those attacks is dead. And, even though I'm elated that his reign is finally over, there's a part of me that feels a bit sad.
I don't feel sadness for bin Laden. I think the fact that he is no longer walking this earth makes the world a little bit safer. But the fact that we had to resort to assassination... for some reason, this bothers me. The thought that Americans had to stoop to that level to rid the world of a monster....
I know that it shouldn't bother me. I know that it was the only way. The capture option just leads to the possibility of escape - maybe even stronger than before. I know that he has been a threat to our country and our way of life for far too long - almost 20 years, if I'm remembering correctly. He needed to be taken down. Yet the knowledge that he was taken out by an American assassin just... I don't know. It saddens me.
I'm not so naive as to believe that the government hasn't sanctioned assassinations before. There have been other times when capture wasn't an option and death was the only solution. I may not know details, but I'm a big girl. The blinders about what America will and will not do have long since been removed. And even though I know that those that participated in the storming of the compound have been trained to kill when necessary - at that this was a necessary time - it saddens me that it was a necessity.
I guess what's bothering me most is the fact that it was premeditated. According to Obama, they went in with the orders to kill rather than capture. Before I have anyone come in and slam me for this bothering me, I'll say again. I KNOW THAT THIS WAS THE ONLY WAY THIS COULD HAVE PLAYED OUT. But for some reason, it bothers me that it was the objective. I guess it's the part of me that feels that life is sacred - even the life of evil. (And yes, I'm against the death penalty.) I wish that the objective could have been capture rather than kill. I wish it hadn't been planned so well that there was a bullet put in the side of his head so he would still be recognizable. I guess I wish that the world itself could be a different place than it is.
For all that a small part of me is saddened by the way it had to be, I am grateful for the one thing that is separates the Americans involved in this mission with those that followed bin Laden's orders to hijack and fly American planes into populated areas. The fact that these men (and maybe women - I'm not sure who made up the team) did their best to make sure that no civilians were harmed. bin Laden wasn't the only casualty, but my understanding is that none of the people that were killed were civilians. And I hope I've heard correctly.
So... yeah. There are a lot of various thoughts running through my mind. I'm glad, yet I'm sad. And I don't feel like rejoicing for this necessity. Because for all that the lives taken were those who had taken hundreds... thousands... of lives themselves, we still took human lives. And having to resort to killing another - no matter how evil we may think he is - is enough to sober me.
I was in NY on 9/11/01. I was at a training class at my company's main office, across the street from the Empire State Building. As we were on the bottom floor, we weren't told anything about the planes being flown into the Twin Towers until around 10 or 10:30. That's when we were told to evacuate the building. We had no idea if more attacks would be coming, if the Empire State Building was going to be a target, or what was happening. I spent a little time in my office a few blocks over, and when the word that they were going to be opening Penn Station and letting the trains run (which was incorrect at the time), I stood with a large crowd of people outside the 32nd street entrance of Penn Station.
I remember three things most strongly from that day - the pain of my feet in slightly too tight shoes, the kindness of the crowd around me, and the fear that every one of us felt when we heard a plane overhead (US fighters, but at the time, we weren't sure of anything). I was so glad when they finally let us onto the trains 3 hours later, and felt even better when my train pulled into my home station so I could be away from the city for awhile.
The aftermath hit me the hardest. There were flyers plastered to every available surface in Penn Station, so many people begging for word on loved ones, not knowing if they were caught inside the tower when it fell. I cried daily, seeing the desperation for information and wishing I knew ways to ease their pain. Almost 10 years, and that's still the strongest memory I have - the pictures inside Penn Station.
And it's been with me for 10 years. I'm not living in NY any longer. I moved just over a year later. Nashville is very different from NYC. But the thoughts still remain. Strange as it sounds, I hope they never do. Time has given me the ability to put distance between myself and those raw emotions. But I can recall them simply, and I think to forget that would dishonor the memory of those that died.
Now the news has come that the mastermind of those attacks is dead. And, even though I'm elated that his reign is finally over, there's a part of me that feels a bit sad.
I don't feel sadness for bin Laden. I think the fact that he is no longer walking this earth makes the world a little bit safer. But the fact that we had to resort to assassination... for some reason, this bothers me. The thought that Americans had to stoop to that level to rid the world of a monster....
I know that it shouldn't bother me. I know that it was the only way. The capture option just leads to the possibility of escape - maybe even stronger than before. I know that he has been a threat to our country and our way of life for far too long - almost 20 years, if I'm remembering correctly. He needed to be taken down. Yet the knowledge that he was taken out by an American assassin just... I don't know. It saddens me.
I'm not so naive as to believe that the government hasn't sanctioned assassinations before. There have been other times when capture wasn't an option and death was the only solution. I may not know details, but I'm a big girl. The blinders about what America will and will not do have long since been removed. And even though I know that those that participated in the storming of the compound have been trained to kill when necessary - at that this was a necessary time - it saddens me that it was a necessity.
I guess what's bothering me most is the fact that it was premeditated. According to Obama, they went in with the orders to kill rather than capture. Before I have anyone come in and slam me for this bothering me, I'll say again. I KNOW THAT THIS WAS THE ONLY WAY THIS COULD HAVE PLAYED OUT. But for some reason, it bothers me that it was the objective. I guess it's the part of me that feels that life is sacred - even the life of evil. (And yes, I'm against the death penalty.) I wish that the objective could have been capture rather than kill. I wish it hadn't been planned so well that there was a bullet put in the side of his head so he would still be recognizable. I guess I wish that the world itself could be a different place than it is.
For all that a small part of me is saddened by the way it had to be, I am grateful for the one thing that is separates the Americans involved in this mission with those that followed bin Laden's orders to hijack and fly American planes into populated areas. The fact that these men (and maybe women - I'm not sure who made up the team) did their best to make sure that no civilians were harmed. bin Laden wasn't the only casualty, but my understanding is that none of the people that were killed were civilians. And I hope I've heard correctly.
So... yeah. There are a lot of various thoughts running through my mind. I'm glad, yet I'm sad. And I don't feel like rejoicing for this necessity. Because for all that the lives taken were those who had taken hundreds... thousands... of lives themselves, we still took human lives. And having to resort to killing another - no matter how evil we may think he is - is enough to sober me.
19 April 2011
Just Hugs... Please
I can't go into a lot of detail about all of it right now, but today has been a day of complete and utter suck. I have a lot of worries on my mind, a lot of things that I have to push through with. I've got so many things going through my mind and I want to write but I just can't. I want to write about mundane things, to catch myself up on my postings and my A to Zs. But I can't think of it right now. I can't focus on the things that I need to because of other things on my mind.
One of the things that I can talk about is Teddy's continuing to push me to the point of unreasonable anger. He refuses to listen to what I tell him when he's not hearing the things that he wants to hear. He runs out of the house to do what he wants to do. He stands in front of my cart when we're in the store and I'm not heading to the portion of the store he wants to immediately go to. He informs me that he WILL do what he wants, regardless of what I say. And I've tried everything I can think of to get him to calm down and try to be the reasonable boy that I know is in there somewhere. I love him, but sometimes I just don't know how to handle him. And today he was in top form, precisely when I didn't need him to be. It was another reason for my to want to be an ostrich right now.
The last thing that is sucktastic is the death of Elisabeth Sladen. For those who aren't familiar with her, or who don't feel like following the link, she played Sarah Jane Smith on Doctor Who. She started as a companion in the 70s and has been one of the Doctor's most loved companions. She was even the first person from old Who that the producers brought back. She was popular enough that she had her own series that ran for four years. And today, she died at 63 of complications of cancer. And it's hitting me hard.
Another thing that isn't a today thing but is a this week this is the fact that I've manage to have us be without a camera. The brand new camera we bought a couple weeks ago slid into the washer without my knowledge and went through the wash cycle. It's currently being looked at by the Geek Squad, but one of the only 2 things that aren't covered is submersion so I'm not expecting much from it. Then the old camera, which I figured we could use as a backup until we found out what happened with the new one, has disappeared. No idea where it's at. I've tried tearing the apartment apart, but so far, no luck. And, of course, I have a swap that I need to have it for. Plus, I had pictures from our walk with the SparkNashville crew last week as well.
I need a reboot. I need to restart all the sucky things in my life so I have some modicum of control. I'm not getting it at the moment, and I don't know how to get it. I want to curl up in bed and pretend that the world doesn't exist. But I can't. Because I'm Mommy. And Wife. And Friend. And an ADULT.
But sometimes I really hate being an adult. I'd just love to throw a tantrum like Teddy does sometimes. I know it won't cure anything, but I wonder if it might not make me feel better.
One of the things that I can talk about is Teddy's continuing to push me to the point of unreasonable anger. He refuses to listen to what I tell him when he's not hearing the things that he wants to hear. He runs out of the house to do what he wants to do. He stands in front of my cart when we're in the store and I'm not heading to the portion of the store he wants to immediately go to. He informs me that he WILL do what he wants, regardless of what I say. And I've tried everything I can think of to get him to calm down and try to be the reasonable boy that I know is in there somewhere. I love him, but sometimes I just don't know how to handle him. And today he was in top form, precisely when I didn't need him to be. It was another reason for my to want to be an ostrich right now.
The last thing that is sucktastic is the death of Elisabeth Sladen. For those who aren't familiar with her, or who don't feel like following the link, she played Sarah Jane Smith on Doctor Who. She started as a companion in the 70s and has been one of the Doctor's most loved companions. She was even the first person from old Who that the producers brought back. She was popular enough that she had her own series that ran for four years. And today, she died at 63 of complications of cancer. And it's hitting me hard.
Another thing that isn't a today thing but is a this week this is the fact that I've manage to have us be without a camera. The brand new camera we bought a couple weeks ago slid into the washer without my knowledge and went through the wash cycle. It's currently being looked at by the Geek Squad, but one of the only 2 things that aren't covered is submersion so I'm not expecting much from it. Then the old camera, which I figured we could use as a backup until we found out what happened with the new one, has disappeared. No idea where it's at. I've tried tearing the apartment apart, but so far, no luck. And, of course, I have a swap that I need to have it for. Plus, I had pictures from our walk with the SparkNashville crew last week as well.
I need a reboot. I need to restart all the sucky things in my life so I have some modicum of control. I'm not getting it at the moment, and I don't know how to get it. I want to curl up in bed and pretend that the world doesn't exist. But I can't. Because I'm Mommy. And Wife. And Friend. And an ADULT.
But sometimes I really hate being an adult. I'd just love to throw a tantrum like Teddy does sometimes. I know it won't cure anything, but I wonder if it might not make me feel better.
08 March 2011
Once again, back in the saddle
The last several weeks have been insane. Between Teddy's birthday weekend and an unexpected trip to Philly/NJ for a funeral, I have barely had a chance to breath let alone get anything done. While there is still a lot of chaos around me, I'm trying to feel revitalized enough to get everything done. I'm still trying to come up with a plan of attack... I have some ideas, but I really need to sit down and write them out. I need to come up with something to keep everything in as well. I'm getting ready to head out for several errands, including running to Wal-Mart, so I may be able to find something that will help me out. And tonight, Rich is taking the boys out to go shopping for my birthday (am I seriously going to be 37 on Friday? Gah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!), so I might be able to get some of my organization done then.
I'm still staying about the same in the weight department. I think I need to revamp my goals again, but that shouldn't be too difficult. I'm still determined that I'm going to make the changes that I need to to be healthy. The weather has been nicer, so I might be able to get out and walk more. I bought another new pedometer - the one that I got with the DS program had the hook break off so it won't stay on my hip/shoe/whatever, and it doesn't do well in my pocket. But the new one doesn't seem to be working right either. I'll figure something out. When I'm out at the store today, I'm going to pick up some more fruit so I have some healthier options for snacking.
I'm pretty behind in Swap-Bot again, in large part because of the trip to the NE. I think tomorrow is going to be a Focus on Swap-Bot day. Kids should be in PDO, so that should give me some time for taking care of things without the boys driving me insane. I'm hoping to have everything back to normal on that end by the weekend. We'll see how it goes, though.
I still have a lot of backlog with writing book reviews as well. I'm going to write that up on a list as well, for the various things that I need to do. That crosses over into Swap-Bot, since one of the swaps I'm in is a book log for the first quarter of 2011. It shouldn't be too difficult, though, since most of the books I've read are graphic novels. I did, however, listen to a couple of audio books on the trip, so those will count as well.
I have a grand plan for cleaning. Rather than focus on a room at a time, I'm going to focus on a section of a room at a time. The rest of the house might be a mess, but that isn't to worry about right now. Instead, I'm going to start at one corner of the apartment - specifically, the far left corner in the kitchen. I'm going to clean and organize from that point forward until I feel finished for the day, then I'm going to quit. The next day, I can pick up from that point. While I go, I'm also going to decorate - pictures on walls, things like that. I won't have to be stressed because I don't have a specific amount that needs to be done daily, but I'll still be able to see progress.
There's fun worked in here as well. Yesterday, before we got home, we stopped by GameStop to pick up our reserved copies of Pokemon: Black and Pokemon: White. It's pretty cool because everything is brand new - new area, completely new pokemon, and I've been avoiding spoiling myself so I don't know what will be coming up. Along with Pokemon, I'm finally downloading WoW to the new computer (which came in right before the trip to the NE). So I'm going to make some time for that as well. After all, I'm paying for it, I might as well use it.
I'm getting back into a few other things as well. I finally got the 1st disc of Season 4 of Dexter, so I'm catching up on that. I'm hoping that disc 2 will be in soon. I'm also getting ready to start season 5 of Teen Titans. I just have to send the latest disc back to Netflix. We listened to Book 5 of The 39 Clues on the trip back and have decided that we really want to get back into those, so I have the first several of those on hold at the library. Rather than spending a lot of TV time, we're planning on spending a lot of Audio Book time in the evenings. It'll be nice, I think. Plus, I need to make a trip back to Rick's Comic City to pick up a few new comics. I haven't gotten a box yet, but I'm still thinking about it. I could use more Green Arrow.
Speaking of which, Barnes & Noble is doing an online promotion of buy 3 get the 4th free on their graphic novels. I'm debating picking up some. I have a $20 gift card for B&N anyway, so it would be a good thing to buy. I just have to decide what I want to get.
Re: the trip to Philly... for all that we saw family for a sad reason (my husband's grandmother's funeral), it was actually a pretty good visit. We got to spend time with family and got to have fun with the boys. I got quite a few cute pics of the boys and various members of the family, and I'm hoping to get those up on Picasa and/or Facebook next week. I've got a few things that I'm hoping to put into the scrapbook as well. That's another thing that needs to go onto my To Do list.
We'll be making another trip north this summer. My in-laws have rented a house on the Jersey shore and we'll be there for a week. We're hoping to go up to NY to spend time with my family as well. I'm also hoping that we might be able to include a few days of visiting in Philly with friends and maybe making an extra stop or two at places in VA that we've been wanting to check out (including a super huge book sale that goes on 6 or 7 times a year).
It definitely looks like things are going to be keeping busy. And that's good. I need to keep busy. Especially because Teddy will be starting Kindergarten in the fall. And if I'm busy, I won't have to think about my little boy becoming a big one! :D
Now I'd better get going and run some errands. Just too much going on and we all have to start somewhere! :)
Have a great Fat Tuesday, all!
I'm still staying about the same in the weight department. I think I need to revamp my goals again, but that shouldn't be too difficult. I'm still determined that I'm going to make the changes that I need to to be healthy. The weather has been nicer, so I might be able to get out and walk more. I bought another new pedometer - the one that I got with the DS program had the hook break off so it won't stay on my hip/shoe/whatever, and it doesn't do well in my pocket. But the new one doesn't seem to be working right either. I'll figure something out. When I'm out at the store today, I'm going to pick up some more fruit so I have some healthier options for snacking.
I'm pretty behind in Swap-Bot again, in large part because of the trip to the NE. I think tomorrow is going to be a Focus on Swap-Bot day. Kids should be in PDO, so that should give me some time for taking care of things without the boys driving me insane. I'm hoping to have everything back to normal on that end by the weekend. We'll see how it goes, though.
I still have a lot of backlog with writing book reviews as well. I'm going to write that up on a list as well, for the various things that I need to do. That crosses over into Swap-Bot, since one of the swaps I'm in is a book log for the first quarter of 2011. It shouldn't be too difficult, though, since most of the books I've read are graphic novels. I did, however, listen to a couple of audio books on the trip, so those will count as well.
I have a grand plan for cleaning. Rather than focus on a room at a time, I'm going to focus on a section of a room at a time. The rest of the house might be a mess, but that isn't to worry about right now. Instead, I'm going to start at one corner of the apartment - specifically, the far left corner in the kitchen. I'm going to clean and organize from that point forward until I feel finished for the day, then I'm going to quit. The next day, I can pick up from that point. While I go, I'm also going to decorate - pictures on walls, things like that. I won't have to be stressed because I don't have a specific amount that needs to be done daily, but I'll still be able to see progress.
There's fun worked in here as well. Yesterday, before we got home, we stopped by GameStop to pick up our reserved copies of Pokemon: Black and Pokemon: White. It's pretty cool because everything is brand new - new area, completely new pokemon, and I've been avoiding spoiling myself so I don't know what will be coming up. Along with Pokemon, I'm finally downloading WoW to the new computer (which came in right before the trip to the NE). So I'm going to make some time for that as well. After all, I'm paying for it, I might as well use it.
I'm getting back into a few other things as well. I finally got the 1st disc of Season 4 of Dexter, so I'm catching up on that. I'm hoping that disc 2 will be in soon. I'm also getting ready to start season 5 of Teen Titans. I just have to send the latest disc back to Netflix. We listened to Book 5 of The 39 Clues on the trip back and have decided that we really want to get back into those, so I have the first several of those on hold at the library. Rather than spending a lot of TV time, we're planning on spending a lot of Audio Book time in the evenings. It'll be nice, I think. Plus, I need to make a trip back to Rick's Comic City to pick up a few new comics. I haven't gotten a box yet, but I'm still thinking about it. I could use more Green Arrow.
Speaking of which, Barnes & Noble is doing an online promotion of buy 3 get the 4th free on their graphic novels. I'm debating picking up some. I have a $20 gift card for B&N anyway, so it would be a good thing to buy. I just have to decide what I want to get.
Re: the trip to Philly... for all that we saw family for a sad reason (my husband's grandmother's funeral), it was actually a pretty good visit. We got to spend time with family and got to have fun with the boys. I got quite a few cute pics of the boys and various members of the family, and I'm hoping to get those up on Picasa and/or Facebook next week. I've got a few things that I'm hoping to put into the scrapbook as well. That's another thing that needs to go onto my To Do list.
We'll be making another trip north this summer. My in-laws have rented a house on the Jersey shore and we'll be there for a week. We're hoping to go up to NY to spend time with my family as well. I'm also hoping that we might be able to include a few days of visiting in Philly with friends and maybe making an extra stop or two at places in VA that we've been wanting to check out (including a super huge book sale that goes on 6 or 7 times a year).
It definitely looks like things are going to be keeping busy. And that's good. I need to keep busy. Especially because Teddy will be starting Kindergarten in the fall. And if I'm busy, I won't have to think about my little boy becoming a big one! :D
Now I'd better get going and run some errands. Just too much going on and we all have to start somewhere! :)
Have a great Fat Tuesday, all!
28 February 2011
Life Never Slows Down, Not for an Instant
Things have been incredibly crazy in the Sanity Household. There was one heck of a storm last Thursday and, from what I've been told, at least one tornado touchdown. When I was driving the kids to PDO on Friday morning, I saw bits of devastation. No houses down, but a lot of debris and a lot of signs torn. There is a hotel almost across the street from the church and it's sign was just twisted. The billboard nearby had it's ad pulled off. And when I got to the church, there was a bunch more to see. Shingles off the roof, tree branches piled around... it didn't look too pretty. And when the boys and I got to the door where PDO is, we were met by the director who told us the power was out, so they were cancelling PDO. It's was pretty chilly and since they have electric heat, keeping the kids there would have been a bad idea. So back home I went with the boys, unsure what to do with the day.
My friend Becca brought her kids over, so the four of them had a blast playing all over the house. And while they were there, a knock on the door let me know that a package had arrived. It was the new desktop. Which... was strange. Not that we got it, because we'd ordered it. But more because they had first sent us a message saying it would be late sending out, then sent a message saying it had shipped but wouldn't be here until the 1st. Still... new computer! Rich and I put the desk together on Friday night and the computer on Saturday morning. We didn't really have a lot of time to play on it, though, because of a bunch of errands that needed to be run. And Sunday was another day filled with busy. But we are finding time to get acquainted anyway.
On Saturday night, we got some bad news that requires a trip north (can't go into much detail at the moment). It's necessitated a lot of shifting of schedules and getting things together quickly. We'll be leaving on Wednesday at around 4am. I'm feeling a bit crazier than usual trying to get these things done but I know I'll get it done. The one thing that makes me feel kinda bad is that I had to e-mail all my swap partners and let them know what's going on and that the packages might be a bit late.
Today is going to be a day filled with laundry, cleaning and finding things that we'll need to bring on our trip. I did the shopping for it (since we try to avoid eating out for lunch if we can) and got totally soaked. Thank you, horrendous thunderstorm that's drifting through the area.
Tomorrow, the weather is supposed to be better so I'm going to bring the van for an oil change and to get new windshield wipers. I've got to go down to Cool Springs to pick up pictures that we'd had taken there, and I need to get the packing done. There are probably other things on my list, but I don't want to look at it right now. I want to pretend I'm not doing anything much.
We'll be bringing the netbook with us north. I'm hoping to have a chance to update my book reviews during that time. The list gets longer and I get no closer to writing them all up. But I will. I know that I will.
And now, before I put the boys down for their naps and dive into cleaning/laundry/packing mode, I'll leave you with a few pics from the last few months.
My friend Becca brought her kids over, so the four of them had a blast playing all over the house. And while they were there, a knock on the door let me know that a package had arrived. It was the new desktop. Which... was strange. Not that we got it, because we'd ordered it. But more because they had first sent us a message saying it would be late sending out, then sent a message saying it had shipped but wouldn't be here until the 1st. Still... new computer! Rich and I put the desk together on Friday night and the computer on Saturday morning. We didn't really have a lot of time to play on it, though, because of a bunch of errands that needed to be run. And Sunday was another day filled with busy. But we are finding time to get acquainted anyway.
On Saturday night, we got some bad news that requires a trip north (can't go into much detail at the moment). It's necessitated a lot of shifting of schedules and getting things together quickly. We'll be leaving on Wednesday at around 4am. I'm feeling a bit crazier than usual trying to get these things done but I know I'll get it done. The one thing that makes me feel kinda bad is that I had to e-mail all my swap partners and let them know what's going on and that the packages might be a bit late.
Today is going to be a day filled with laundry, cleaning and finding things that we'll need to bring on our trip. I did the shopping for it (since we try to avoid eating out for lunch if we can) and got totally soaked. Thank you, horrendous thunderstorm that's drifting through the area.
Tomorrow, the weather is supposed to be better so I'm going to bring the van for an oil change and to get new windshield wipers. I've got to go down to Cool Springs to pick up pictures that we'd had taken there, and I need to get the packing done. There are probably other things on my list, but I don't want to look at it right now. I want to pretend I'm not doing anything much.
We'll be bringing the netbook with us north. I'm hoping to have a chance to update my book reviews during that time. The list gets longer and I get no closer to writing them all up. But I will. I know that I will.
And now, before I put the boys down for their naps and dive into cleaning/laundry/packing mode, I'll leave you with a few pics from the last few months.
Sleepy Pete tried to make it to midnight on NYE, but it just didn't happen.
Teddy was really please with the number of tickets he won on his birthday.
This is one of my favorite pics of the Pete. He was sitting in one of the chairs at the library, reading a book.
Teddy being silly at Ruby Tuesday's for brunch (this is the most recent pic of him)
What's this shy stuff? Usually, Pete loves to get his picture taken.
The front cover of my 4th Quarter book log.
And this was the inside formatting.
I was pretty pleased with this particular swap.
There's a lot more uploaded. I'll (hopefully) share a bunch more over the next few days.
28 October 2010
Another curve around the corner
Tuesday morning, my phone rang at 5:30 am. It was my best friend, calling to tell me she was on her way to the hospital for her mom. Mom B had been in the hospital for several days and had been getting worse. Carm was scared, and so was I. Even though Mom's health had been bad for a long, long time, she'd always pulled through. It didn't look like it was going to happen this time. And, unfortunately, it didn't. Carm called me a bit after 9 to let me know that she was gone.
Mom B had been there for me a lot after I left college. She welcomed me into her home, had no problem with me calling her Mom and just WAS like a mom to me. So her loss has been devastating to me as well. Not as bad as it's been for Carm or her husband, but still very rough. Her funeral is this weekend, but I won't be able to make it there. Florida is too far of a drive and I don't have a lot of money. However, her internment is in Indiana on Tuesday. That's only a 5 hour drive, so I'll be driving there Tuesday morning, spending the night and driving home on Wednesday morning. I suspect I'm going to be a bit quiet at that time. Of course, considering my spotty posting, people might not miss me.
I've been trying to keep busy with swapping and reading. I've got to get a few pictures of one of the journals I'm working on. I'm pretty pleased with how it's come out. I've been doing a bit of crafting in it, which has come out pretty good. I've got a lot of online swaps going as well - Halloween cards, Cheer Up cards, things like that. I've still got a bit of bookkeeping to do with several of them. But I'm surprisingly on track for everything. Part of me is wondering when that will fall apart!
I also decided I needed one MORE thing on my plate and I've picked up crochet again. I used to do some when I was younger, mostly chain stitching, and I needed something that I could see when I finished. So.... crochet it is. I've started doing bag. I'm 3 rows into it. I'm hoping to work on it some while I'm in Indiana.
I also have been working a bit on my 101 in 1001. Still need to get all those figured out and written. And I've got an intro post that I need to write for LJ Idol. That one has been a bit harder because I just don't know what to day about myself or how to say it to catch people's attention. I'll figure it out, I'm sure. Before the end of the weekend.
This weekend is going to be as busy as last weekend. The kids have trick or treating at PDO tomorrow (which reminds me, I need to make up the bags to hand out there), then I'm giving blood at 12:15. The kids are out of school at 2, we're coming back to my place to hang out for awhile with Becca and her kids and then going to my church for the Fall Festival. Plus we'll be making a stop at IHOP because they have free pancakes for the kids. Saturday is library, followed by the Fall Festival at the kids PDO, followed by a birthday party and possibly trick or treating at one of the malls in the evening. Sunday is church and trunk or treating at the church where we get our Angel Food. Plus I've got to work on getting things cleaned up, clothes packed and to be ready to leave early on Tuesday morning for my trip.
Will time calm back down again? Probably not. But this is probably for the best.
And in another off-hand remark, I'm watching Clash of the Titans on BBC America. I've never seen it before. I think I'm going to have to borrow it so I can watch without commercials. Now I'm off to do a bit more brain work. Keeping busy is a good thing. Or so it seems.
Mom B had been there for me a lot after I left college. She welcomed me into her home, had no problem with me calling her Mom and just WAS like a mom to me. So her loss has been devastating to me as well. Not as bad as it's been for Carm or her husband, but still very rough. Her funeral is this weekend, but I won't be able to make it there. Florida is too far of a drive and I don't have a lot of money. However, her internment is in Indiana on Tuesday. That's only a 5 hour drive, so I'll be driving there Tuesday morning, spending the night and driving home on Wednesday morning. I suspect I'm going to be a bit quiet at that time. Of course, considering my spotty posting, people might not miss me.
I've been trying to keep busy with swapping and reading. I've got to get a few pictures of one of the journals I'm working on. I'm pretty pleased with how it's come out. I've been doing a bit of crafting in it, which has come out pretty good. I've got a lot of online swaps going as well - Halloween cards, Cheer Up cards, things like that. I've still got a bit of bookkeeping to do with several of them. But I'm surprisingly on track for everything. Part of me is wondering when that will fall apart!
I also decided I needed one MORE thing on my plate and I've picked up crochet again. I used to do some when I was younger, mostly chain stitching, and I needed something that I could see when I finished. So.... crochet it is. I've started doing bag. I'm 3 rows into it. I'm hoping to work on it some while I'm in Indiana.
I also have been working a bit on my 101 in 1001. Still need to get all those figured out and written. And I've got an intro post that I need to write for LJ Idol. That one has been a bit harder because I just don't know what to day about myself or how to say it to catch people's attention. I'll figure it out, I'm sure. Before the end of the weekend.
This weekend is going to be as busy as last weekend. The kids have trick or treating at PDO tomorrow (which reminds me, I need to make up the bags to hand out there), then I'm giving blood at 12:15. The kids are out of school at 2, we're coming back to my place to hang out for awhile with Becca and her kids and then going to my church for the Fall Festival. Plus we'll be making a stop at IHOP because they have free pancakes for the kids. Saturday is library, followed by the Fall Festival at the kids PDO, followed by a birthday party and possibly trick or treating at one of the malls in the evening. Sunday is church and trunk or treating at the church where we get our Angel Food. Plus I've got to work on getting things cleaned up, clothes packed and to be ready to leave early on Tuesday morning for my trip.
Will time calm back down again? Probably not. But this is probably for the best.
And in another off-hand remark, I'm watching Clash of the Titans on BBC America. I've never seen it before. I think I'm going to have to borrow it so I can watch without commercials. Now I'm off to do a bit more brain work. Keeping busy is a good thing. Or so it seems.
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